Day 6 Mom and Me (and Jim)

I know the title isn’t grammatically correct, but I think it sounds cute.

My mom and I have always been close.  We like to shop together-like all the girls in the family.  We are both teachers.  We love to go out to lunch and we love a good joke.  My mom has taught me, through example, how to be a good mom and a dedicated spouse. I don’t think I can live up to her example, but she has shown all of us what it is to be a good person.

My mom is the strongest person I know.  Her dedication to my father has been constant, and I witnessed it to the fullest these past couple months.   She was by my dad’s side at the hospitals  11 to 12 hours every day.  We  took turns visiting Dad and driving Mom back and forth.  We tried to get her to go get lunch or tea, but she would say, “No, I don’t want to leave him.” She was my dad’s  number one advocate- asking questions, taking notes, making sure she had the night nurse’s phone number, ordering his breakfasts, lunches, and dinners, and now scheduling all his follow up appointments. She is amazing!

I had the pleasure of having my mom stay with Jim and I the week she and my dad stayed with us and then while my dad was in both Hinsdale and Lagrange Hospitals.  It is something I will cherish forever. We had our morning rituals- timing our showers and blow drying, lemon ice water and coffee, packing our bags and lunch boxes for the day -mine for school and hers for the day at the hospital.

Our evenings were a little different.  Jim had dinner ready every night, except when we stopped at the The Country House on our way home from the hospital. Sometimes Carolyn, my sister, joined us for dinner when she dropped Mom off at our place.

The conversations were, at times, fun, funny, and entertaining.  But there were heart-wrenching moments. Mom missed my dad terribly!  She was so scared!  She cried often and we cried with her.  She cried out of anger, out of confusion, and out of fear.  She felt her husband slipping away and she wasn’t ready. She wept in my arms and in my husband’s arms. She cried hard and loud. She cried herself to sleep many nights.  But every morning, she got up, called the night nurse to see how my dad’s night went, got dressed, put on her makeup, including lipstick, and went to the hospital  with a positive attitude. She left her sadness, fear, and anger back where it was safe, in our home.

This morning was the first morning in four weeks that  I woke up without my mom here.  I missed her this morning. I made one glass of lemon ice water.  I took out an avocado, but put it back.  I missed our morning conversation.  I missed her cute morning compliment – even if I looked like crap. But Mom is home. Mom is with her husband. She is sharing the bed that she feared would never have the both of them in it again.  Mom is home. Mom and Dad are home.  I couldn’t be happier!


4 thoughts on “Day 6 Mom and Me (and Jim)

  1. Kathy, I love this post and how you were able to capture the past 4 weeks. My nephew just left yesterday and I sat in the bathroom for a moment staring at all of his cars lined up in my bathtub. I know the feeling. I am glad that your dad and mom are back home.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Really love this post. Your depiction of your mother’s vulnerability juxtaposed with her strength was beautiful. I can’t imagine what this has all been like for all of you.


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